[00:00:00] Jody: Actually, you know, weakest thing, I’m a child of
[00:00:03] Gil: God and this battery, the battery’s getting bad. Oh God.
Lead me, guide me, walk beside me, help me find the way. Teach me all that I must do to live with Him someday. What? Go ahead. I am a child of God, and He has sent me here. Has given me an earthly home, with parents kind and dear. Lead me, guide me, walk beside me, help me find a way. Teach me all that I must see, to live with Him someday.
I think your cord’s burning on the light bulb, Dad. Okay. Ooh. What’s that, Jodi? Ooh, it’s like a tiny little boo boo, huh? Come out
[00:01:49] Jody: from behind your wife, David. What? Come on. Come on, everybody. Let’s just sing last verse. Oh, just the last verse this time. Can you? Can you? Can you? Like it? Do you? Very good!
[00:00:24] Gil: Yeah? Come here just a moment. I just want to check the color on this.
[00:00:31] Unknown: Pardon me? Even better. You come here and start feeding the baby. He wants to check the color on it. Oh, please. I have no color. I have all white.
[00:00:43] Gil: Okay. Well, I
[00:00:44] Unknown: have black and white, so. I’m, I’m not a filmmaker. Happy Mother’s Day, Dad.
Come here, E. T. I react fast. I know.
[00:01:01] Gil: Hi, Ian.
[00:01:03] Unknown: Yeah. Say hi, grandpa. Hi, grandpa. You my
[00:01:07] Gil: friend.
[00:01:08] Unknown: Friend.
[00:01:09] Gil: Hey, are you my friend? Ian? Ian, are you my friend?
Unknown (several instances, not specific individuals)
[00:00:00] Gil: Weird. I’ve been riding a bus the last couple days.
This lady says, you know, she said, I sit up front because all the derelicts sit in the back. So I got up and left . The back of the bus
[00:00:33] Elizabeth: lady said that too. Mm-Hmm. .
[00:00:36] Gil: She says All the deux go to the back of the bus. So
[00:00:38] Elizabeth: you went to the Beck’s office? I got
[00:00:39] Gil: up and walked to the back of the bus. . Oh,
[00:00:44] Elizabeth: sorry.
[00:00:45] Gil: I can take a hint, right?
That’s where I’ve been riding ever since. Did she give you any change before you left? No, not yet.
[00:01:00] Elizabeth: I’d be glad to help. Bring something for anybody that wants anything. I’d say a little salt and sugar. Anybody like salt and pepper?
[00:01:17] Gil: Get up off that carpet and get out. How
[00:01:22] Unknown: did
[00:01:23] Gil: it go? The ham was real good, Mom. That was just perfect.
[00:01:32] Elizabeth: Well, I can’t take the credit for that, Dad.
[00:01:37] Unknown: Why not?
[00:01:41] Gil: That farmer, Ron, called his hammer. That’s not what it
[00:01:48] Elizabeth: is. Hmm.
Boy, we’re on with spotlights on us and everything.
[00:02:06] Gil: I got a funny feeling that camera’s rolling. Is it? Rolling?
[00:02:11] Elizabeth: Oh, no. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Is it
[00:02:15] Gil: going to happen just
[00:02:16] Elizabeth: yet? Did
[00:02:17] Unknown: I spill
[00:02:18] Gil: anything on my hand? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Now it’s starting
[00:02:24] Elizabeth: to get a temperature. Hi, camera. Hi, camera. Hi, camera. Hi, camera. Dad’s camera.
[00:02:32] Unknown: Hi, camera.
[00:02:36] Elizabeth: Hi, camera. What’s
[00:02:38] Gil: that hanging off your pinky, Dad?
[00:02:40] Elizabeth: Oh.
[00:02:43] Gil: Maybe I should go zoom in on that. Zoom in on that there, will ya?
[00:02:47] Elizabeth: And Mom. I’m gonna zoom in on it. He’s up to.
[00:02:51] Gil: He found it in his comic hamburger. Yeah. Down on the handle, Randy. Down on the handle. There. TW.
[00:03:07] Elizabeth: Yeah, I’m adjusting stuff in my face.
[00:03:09] Gil: Coming in?
Yeah. Right there? Yeah. Do I need to focus now? Should be in focus. Put it back where you were. Uh, it doesn’t appear to be in focus to me. Excuse me. I think the focus is on automatic. It says auto.
[00:03:32] Elizabeth: Well, put it to manual so you can get a better focus.
[00:03:35] Gil: Focus on the
[00:03:38] Elizabeth: ribbon.
[00:03:39] Gil: Put
[00:03:40] Elizabeth: it to
[00:03:42] Gil: manual. Focus
[00:03:44] Elizabeth: on
[00:03:45] Gil: the
[00:03:46] Elizabeth: ribbon.
[00:03:47] Gil: I guess
[00:03:49] Elizabeth: that’s
[00:03:50] Gil: it. No, it takes it out of focus. Jim,
[00:03:52] Elizabeth: are you ready for some more bread? It’s focusing
[00:03:54] Gil: on the wall back here, Bob.
[00:03:55] Elizabeth: So focus on
[00:03:59] Gil: the ribbon and just leave it that way. I have a
[00:04:03] Elizabeth: question.
This will last you a while. Show them out
[00:04:09] Gil: there. Show them. Got that on focus now, Randy? Yeah. Mom, put your hand out there with Dad’s. Okay, hold on.
[00:04:24] Elizabeth: Say Merry Christmas, child of our mother.
[00:04:27] Gil: Merry Christmas, child of our mother. Here, put your hand on top of
[00:04:31] Elizabeth: his. Here, give me that. There we go. Like a newlywed. Like a newlywed. Yeah, really. Okay, honey, got it?
[00:04:41] Gil: Yep.
[00:04:42] Elizabeth: Ready?
[00:04:44] Gil: Put it back so we can see everybody. Okay, Dad.
[00:04:47] Elizabeth: Jim, do you want some, uh, power in? No, just turn the
[00:04:50] Gil: camera that way.
No,
[00:04:51] Elizabeth: did you say? How do you think I need the
[00:04:53] Unknown: chair? He’s gonna poke me right on this plate.
[00:04:59] Elizabeth: See how I eat the whole thing. I was really hungry when I got here. That’s good for you. Most of that.
[00:05:18] Unknown: Whatever makes you happy. Do you want to
[00:05:23] Elizabeth: say hi? You know this picture’s a good one.
When John’s got a pen in his eye and he has a cell phone. Uh huh. I found it at David’s. Other days there’s none of this. You know I need a copy of it. I want to draw it. Oh, they want copies though? No. Randy won’t want copies of it. Is that the video? No, not the video. Oh, you can get a copy of the video too.
Oh, don’t we have a copy of
[00:05:52] Unknown: the video? Yeah, we’re supposed to do that. Can we
[00:05:54] Elizabeth: get a copy of the video? We don’t know what it is. I don’t know. Let’s take the pictures themselves instead. When we, when David, uh, set up the camera on the timer, we were standing up in front of it. Of a stand? We’ve never been able to find it.
David has. I wonder what he had to make. He asked me if I wanted coffee, and I said yes. And I figured you had to make it. I don’t even, I don’t even know which camera those were, but none do you. We’ll get them once I
[00:06:21] Gil: walk 454.
[00:06:23] Elizabeth: Randy, do you want some more, uh, garlic bread?
[00:06:27] Gil: No, I’m fine. Is this what you wanted?
[00:06:29] Elizabeth: I went to
[00:06:38] Gil: Calculator, so I want y’all to know
[00:06:41] Elizabeth: that.
[00:06:43] Gil: Fourteen hours of Calculator, so. Incredible. You forgot to plug it in, right?
[00:06:53] Unknown: It wasn’t our fault.
Randy, can I get you
[00:07:01] Elizabeth: another piece of ham?
Oh, Randy.
Jody, you should sit over there so you’re not just here. Yeah, Jody’s on
[00:07:16] Unknown: primetime TV.
[00:07:19] Elizabeth: You lucked out. Next time I’m sitting there. This is
[00:07:24] Gil: Jody here, in case you can’t tell.
Turn around and give them a
[00:07:30] Elizabeth: little
[00:07:32] Unknown: wave, Jody.
[00:07:36] Elizabeth: Did you take the fountain? Oh, yeah. We’re going to be crying. No,
[00:07:52] Unknown: that’s great.
[00:07:56] Elizabeth: I think we need more conversation. Been blind to watch. I Darby you guys come converse now. Let me eat. Go ahead. You guys good for a couple laughs.
[00:08:17] Unknown: That’s one. It’s two.
[00:08:20] Elizabeth: Hey,
[00:08:21] Gil: it’s two over here. Jim, you wanted to be three. Fourteen hours, huh? Jim, what a calculator.
[00:08:35] Elizabeth: Right. Hey look, Patrick. This 12 C.
[00:08:43] Gil: Way to configure. You can program it.
[00:08:48] Elizabeth: Tell us some of the jokes we heard up at the high street. Get that watch. Tell us if you’re real estate for ya.
[00:08:56] Gil: Yeah, a hundred dollar little calculator.
All sorts of games, huh? Pretty incredible.
[00:09:02] Elizabeth: I
[00:09:05] Gil: don’t know who I’ve already told this joke to, but whoever’s here will laugh anyway. Okay.
[00:09:25] Elizabeth: We were in
[00:09:25] Gil: the High Priest dinner
[00:09:27] Elizabeth: the other day, and our
[00:09:29] Gil: Student President is quite a card anyway.
[00:09:33] Elizabeth: In fact, when they put him in, they said we may all just laugh our way to the celestial heaven. I thought that was funny, because he is, he’s just a card. Okay. for your time.
[00:09:44] Gil: You’re on. You’re cleared for take off, Gail.
You’re cleared for take off. Anyway, one of the jokes he told,
[00:09:50] Elizabeth: Do you want some chocolate? In the
[00:09:53] Gil: Fiji Islands, brains are a delicacy. So, they decided that they were having a, um, high priest dinner there, and so they decided that, to have a, a real splurge. So the fellow in charge went to the meat market to check on, on brains, and he was surprised by a specific reporter.
And, uh, they had, uh, Elder Springs for 1. 95 a pound. And they had Bishop Springs for 2. 95 a pound. And they had State Presidents Springs for 5. 95 a pound. And the fellow says, How can you charge 5. 95 for State Presidents Springs? He calls you out, he says, You have no idea how many state presidents it takes to get a pound of bread.
Now, Barbara has one. Marvy, tell me the joke.
[00:11:00] Unknown: I don’t want you to tell one. Terry Ridman, please. Tell it for me. I’m talking about not to tell his wife at all.
[00:11:08] Elizabeth: This is good. They
[00:11:11] Unknown: all have
[00:11:12] Elizabeth: to know. Which one of my better jokes do you want to hear? Which one do you want me to pick up?
Yeah. Okay, go ahead,
[00:11:26] Gil: Barb.
[00:11:26] Elizabeth: This is a
[00:11:27] Gil: light bulb joke. This is
[00:11:29] Elizabeth: a puff joke. A
[00:11:30] Gil: light bulb. A
[00:11:31] Elizabeth: light
[00:11:32] Gil: bulb. A
[00:11:33] Elizabeth: light bulb.
[00:11:35] Gil: A little loud speaker.
[00:11:36] Elizabeth: How many Mormon ladies does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don’t know. You heard
[00:11:41] Gil: this one? No. I heard it.
[00:11:43] Elizabeth: I do.
[00:11:44] Gil: What’s about love?
[00:11:45] Elizabeth: What
[00:11:45] Gil: is it? What is it?
[00:11:47] Elizabeth: Twelve. One to screw in the bulb and eleven to make That
[00:11:52] Gil: is cute.
[00:11:52] Elizabeth: You hear about the, So close to the truth.
[00:11:58] Gil: You know, you hear about the black guy and the Polack working together in this warehouse. And the black guy says, I’m gonna, I’m gonna do something dumb. So I can collect unemployment, I’ll get fired, I can collect unemployment. Polof says, gee, okay, you know, I’m going to be working here by myself.
So the black guy gets up and hangs from the rafters, hanging upside down. The boss comes in and says, what are you doing? The black guy says, I’m a light bulb. And the guy says, you get down from here, you’re fired, you get out of here. And the Polof is following him out. And the boss says, Where do you think you’re going?
